Thursday, March 15, 2012

Handy Reference Guide to Scientific Terminology

Geometric Cells - These cardiomyocytes have adopted geometric shapes by adhering to surfaces coated with fibronectin— an extracellular matrix protein that anchors cells.

Aminoacyl – An -NH/sub2 that's a real jerk

Apical membrane – That green bumpy stuff on the outside of a baby dill

Asymmetry – Where you bury dead people

Beta-sheet – Linen you only bring out for company

CA/sup{2+} channel – The all-milk TV station

Chemotaxis – A cab which provides drug therapy

Detergents – What women do when telling a guy to take a hike

Diglyceride – what you scream out when trying to kill a glyceride

Microtome – An itty bitty book

Pachytene – Adolescent elephants

Plastid – Drunk

Prokaryote – In favour of take-out food

Redox – Rusty cattle

Taxol – Liberal plan for increasing revenue

Stereochemistry – having the correct speakers for your CD player

Free Radical – a political movement

Propane – sadomasochistic tendencies

Grignard – a three foot mile

Periodic Acid – sometimes it is and sometimes it ain't

Biotin – how much coffee you purchase

Prostate – when you want FSU to beat U.Florida in football

Helminth –what the hockeyplayers wear on their heads, thilly

IL-2 – me also

Homology – the study of real estate

Membrane – the opposite of forgettin'

Synapse – what you have after horizontal recreation

Phorbol – why the batter took first base

PIP2 – finding your boss at the next urinal

Micellar – where I stayed when the tornado hit

Palmitoyl – what your hands secrete when you're nervous

Polar Head Group – Inuit psychiatrists

Amphipathic – the ability to hike both ways

Bilayer – yeah, like, I'm gonna touch that one

Lecithin – fatter

Porin – what it is when it's rainin'

Schiff Base – stealing second

Ionophore – where I ended when I fell

Hydrophobic – fear of your electricity bill

Deoxycholate – countin' the oxen

Sulfatide – the effect of a moon on Venusian oceans

Placenta – Act III of V

Allantois – how we found out what Allan knew

Neural Crest – an oral hygiene product for the brain

Trophectoderm – the outer layer of the Stanley Cup

Spermatagonia – the reproductive area in South America

Oogonia – the clumsy area of South America

Oviposition – your opinion on whether one can eat eggs and still be a vegetarian

Uturus – the question of whether you're a native of a visitor

So good, LOL:-)


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